Parenting is a unique opportunity to rewrite the narrative of your upbringing. For those who grew up with emotionally immature parents, the desire to create a different, healthier environment for your own children can feel both empowering and overwhelming. Emotional immaturity in parenting often fosters toxic dynamics—leaving children feeling unseen, invalidated, or responsible for their parents’ emotions. The good news? You have the power to break these patterns and build a family dynamic rooted in emotional safety and connection.

Parenting is a profound journey that shapes not only the lives of your children but also your own emotional world. For adults who grew up with emotionally immature parents, the challenge of modelling healthy emotional behaviour can feel particularly daunting. However, cultivating emotional regulation is an essential skill that not only supports your well-being but also profoundly impacts your child’s emotional development.

Parenting is often described as one of life’s most rewarding journeys, but it can also be one of the most challenging!

If you’ve ever caught yourself reacting in a way that doesn’t align with the parent you want to be—maybe snapping in frustration or feeling overly responsible for your child’s emotions—you’re not alone. These moments often stem from our own unresolved childhood experiences, which subtly shape the way we interact with and nurture our children.

Growing up with an emotionally immature parent often leaves a profound mark. Perhaps you were raised by someone who struggled with expressing empathy, dismissed your feelings, or relied on you to meet their emotional needs.

These experiences can create a complex mix of emotions as you become a parent yourself—determined to do things differently but unsure how to navigate uncharted territory.

In a nutshell, emotional gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where someone causes you to question your perceptions, feelings, or even sanity. This is often not too noticeable at first and is done through words or behaviours that dismiss, belittle, or contradict your experiences or emotions.

If you’ve been gaslit, especially by people close to you, it’s common to feel like your self-confidence has been stripped away. When you’re constantly told your feelings are “too much” or that your memories are wrong, it’s no wonder you start doubting yourself.

Growing up with emotionally immature or manipulative individuals can make you second-guess yourself, even as an adult. Being gaslit in your formative years can shape how you see yourself and others, often spilling into adult relationships in unexpected ways.

Many adults feel a constant pressure to live according to their parents’ expectations, even well into adulthood. This pressure can manifest in various aspects of life—career choices, relationships, lifestyle, and even personal values. The sense of obligation to meet these expectations can be overwhelming, often leading to feelings of inadequacy or guilt if you deviate from the path your parents envisioned for you.

In a time when everything is felt so intensely - the grief, the fear, the sadness, the connection - it can be easy to be led by our emotions and our inner monologues. However, being led by our thoughts and emotions can lead us to feel quite unstable - think about how often your emotions change throughout the day.